Giants Ponder Belgian-American Night

Tubesox Nation sources report that Giants top brass is mulling an expansion of their well-received diversity campaign to include a Low Countries Heritage Week culminating in Belgian-American Night. A midweek series during the post-trade deadline "dog days" is said to be the likeliest date. Among other things, the Belgian event will feature Flemish and BrelWalloon sections on opposite sides of the park, a first pitch thrown out by an effeminate EU dignitary, and lax enforcement of the ballpark anti-smoking policy. The sticking point seems to the exact nature of the bobblehead giveaway. Brainy, bow-tied William Neukom favors a cool, understated Jacques Brel, while ever-pragmatic Larry Baer is standing firm on a demographically appropriate Jean-Claude Van Damme.

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